72 Quotes by Marlon Wayans

So, I was sitting there and I watched 'Paranormal Activity' and I was like, 'Boy, white people do dumb stuff in movies.' So I was like, 'Why don't they just leave the house... What if paranormal activity happened to a black couple?'

'Paranormal 1' scared me because I didn't know if it was real or what. 'Blair Witch' was kind of scary for the same reason. It takes the voyeur element away and makes you think, 'Oh crap, this could really happen to me.'

I've never really lived with somebody. Only for very brief periods. I learned I'm not a good roommate. I'm better off when we visit each other. I like the mystery.

Gotta stay in the gym, stay funny, stay sharp. I just love working.

I'm the most inappropriate dad. I curse in front of my kids and their friends. I let my kids watch R-rated movies. I'll walk by the movie theater and say, 'Let's go see that,' and my kids will say, 'No, it's rated R. It's not appropriate for kids.' I'm like Uncle Dad. We have fun. I don't live with them, but I drive over four days a week.

Comedy clubs can be brutal. Those people are for real, and if you aren't funny, they aren't laughing. They don't care who you are.

I went to a performing arts high school, we learned Shakespeare, I did 'Fences.' When you train, you can do anything.

You need to be lucky in life, but it's also what you do with your luck.

I was going to be valedictorian in elementary school, but I got into too many fights, and they made me salutatorian. I was smart back in the day. Now I'm just an idiot.