3 Quotes by Monica McGoldrick

Losses may make us feel as if time had stopped. Families may close down, attempting to control those aspects of their world over which they still have some power, since in the one area that really matters – human relationships – they have lost a sense of control.

All too often people are not aware of the trait – – whether positive or negative – -they have absorbed from their families. You may feel contempt for your family’s pretentiousness and be unaware that you have absorbed some of the same mannerisms. Awareness of the trait could easily lead to it’s amelioration. Similarly, a positive awareness of connectedness to family can give you a sense of belonging and a feeling of continuity that will strengthen your own sense of identity.

Unfortunately it is not possible to destroy our history. It lives inside us, probably the more powerful for our attempts to bury it. We and our families are likely to pay a high price in the present for trying to block out the past. Attempts to cover up family history tend to fester, influencing others born long after the original painful experiences and relationships.