176 Quotes by Neil Leckman

When I was little and my mom got mad at me she would always say, "You know you can be replaced".I have often wondered if I was.

Bad answers for employment questions:Employer: I see here that you worked for the state for three years. Why did you leave that job? "My parole was granted

Bad questions at employment interviews:"Is your drug test graded on a curve?

They say you don't know what you don't know until you know that you don't know it.

I think that last batch of sea monkeys ate my cat!!!

I like to provide American humor for British soccer coaches when possible. During keeper practice I'll offer to stand behind the goal and shag a few balls!!

While walking with a British coach.Why do you chuckle every time we walk by the theater that is showing "Free Willy"?

She cuts with daggerous eyes of fireWords like poison coat fangs of bad intentAnd biting remarks carve into holiday delightsLeaving dark the places once light.

If I have a pocket fun of rainbows am I an optimist, or a guy with wet pants and really large pockets?