176 Quotes by Neil Leckman

How to contact in case of an emergency?I prefer 911 myself...

I am open to comments, I accept with with all humility, or at least what I can muster at short notice.

At a long meeting a man next to me, British I hope, said, "Man, I'd kill for a fag about now" I chuckled when everyone moved away from him but me."Why did everyone do that?""They say that smoking can kill, and they're just being cautious""What about that fellow there smiling at me?""Don't know, maybe he's a chain smoker...

We started our journey across the waistlands by folowing the enormous belt!!

I used to work at an Almond milking farm. Had to use special gloves and forceps to get-R-done!!

Place the proper tool in front of the right person at the correct moment and anything is possible

How many of you knew what the Thomas A Swift Electric Rifle was? An idea in the book years ago, and now who hasn't heard of a T.A.S.E.R.

Went outside last night with a 'black' light and shined it on my yard. Are them shiny things 'Dark Matter"?

He thought it was cool he could go back in time whenever he sneezed until allergy season started!!