253 Quotes by Norm Macdonald

Our passions may be compared to certain slaves--the more severity we show them, the better they obey us.

The beginning of wisdom is the knowledge of folly.

During misfortunes, nothing aggravates our condition more, than to be esteemed deserving of them.

Envy, like a false mirror, distorts the symmetry of the sweetest form.

Few people love with the violence they hate.

In estimating the adversities of life, we would seldom have much reason to complain of the evils we suffer, did we understand the dangers we daily escape.

Violent people usually express their love of a thing by their hatred of its opposite.

All kinds of violence on the TV. You're not supposed to watch violence on the TV. Children, they can't watch it 'cause they're afraid maybe the kids will copy something they see on the TV. I can't even get a funny cartoon anymore because some 12-year-old somewhere watched a particularly violent episode of the Road Runner-Coyote show, and the next day, they found him at the bottom of a canyon, two giant springs strapped to his feet.

Love is an artful arrangement of artless pretensions, whereby we labor to appear innocent in what we desire to be most cunning.