307 Quotes by Oliver Markus Malloy

Women use sex to get love. Men use love to get sex.

For us men, sex is the most important thing in the world. Men feel about sex the way vampires feel about blood. They don't just like it, they crave it. That's why vampire stories always have strong sexual undercurrents. A vampire's hunger is simply a metaphor for a man's lust.

Owning a gun proves "In God we trust" is a lie. If you actually trusted in God, you wouldn't feel like you need a gun.

Ten short years ago, nobody had ever heard of a selfie. But today every decent cell phone has not one but two cameras, so you can take idiotic duck face pictures. And don't forget the billion dollar selfie-stick industry. Capitalism has found a whole new way to turn our vanity into profit.

Love makes life worth living.

Envy is the desire to have what someone else has. Jealousy is the fear of losing what you have. The more insecure you are about yourself or your relationship, the more jealous you are, because you are afraid to lose your significant other to someone else.

If you’ve never had actual freedom, you don’t miss it. You can’t miss what you’ve never had.

Patriotism is a gateway drug to fascism. Tribalism is the gateway to racism.

The most painful thing in life is to watch the people you love wither away.