307 Quotes by Oliver Markus Malloy

Sometimes conspiracy theories are true. Most of the time they're not.

The NRA brainwashes you into believing that you need to buy a bunch of guns, to protect yourself from all the people with guns.

Guns are useless against a tyrannical government with tanks and drones.

Why ban guns? Let's give everyone rocket launchers! What could possibly go wrong?

It's easy not to abuse your power when you don't actually have any power.

Yo mama so slutty, Trump still owes her hush money.

If a girl wants to sell her body, so be it. None of my business. Don't athletes sell their bodies, too? People can do behind closed doors whatever they want, as long as it doesn't hurt anyone else.

Nobody gives a shit that you're offended. I'm not. And my opinion is more important to me than yours.

Why do some people feel offended by the word shit, but not by the word poop? Because some little old lady at the FCC decided that good citizens don't use the word shit, and suddenly using a word like shit or fuck becomes an act of civil disobedience. Suddenly a little four-letter word has the power to shock.