675 Quotes by P. G. Wodehouse

I laughed derisively. "For goodness' sake, don't start gargling now. This is serious." "I was laughing." "Oh, were you? Well, I'm glad to see you taking it in this merry spirit." "Derisively," I explained.

Sober or blotto, this is your motto: keep muddling through.

He was a long, stripy policeman, who flowed out of his uniform at odd spots, as if Nature, setting out to make a constable, had had a good deal of material left over which she had not liked to throw away but hardly seemed able to fit into the general scheme.

Slice him where you like, a hellhound is always a hellhound.

You know how it is with some girls. They seem to take the stuffing right out of you. I mean to say, there is something about their personality that paralyses the vocal cords and reduces the contents of the brain to cauliflower.

She could not have gazed at him with a more rapturous intensity if she had been a small child and he a saucer of ice cream.

There's too much of that where-every-prospect-pleases-and-only-man-is-vile stuff buzzing around for my taste.

It was a nasty look. It made me feel as if I were something the dog had brought in and intended to bury later on, when he had time.

It looked something like a pen wiper and something like a piece of hearth-rug. A second and keener inspection revealed it as a Pekinese puppy.