911 Quotes by P. J. O'Rourke

People will tell you anything but what they do is always the truth.

I didn't see any NRA officials killing babies in Waco...

Then there was communism's weak-tea sister, socialism. Socialists maintained that we shouldn't take all the money away from all the people since all the people don't have money. We should take all the money away from only the people who make money. Then, when we run out of that, we could take more money from the people who...hey, wait! Where'd you people go? What do you mean you're "tax exiles in Monaco?"

Disney's House of the Future had the clean simplicity prized in the 1950s as relief from decades of frayed patchwork, jury-rigging, and make-do clutter caused by Depression and war.

Writing on a computer makes saving what's been written too easy. Pretentious lead sentences are kept, not tossed. Instead of sitting surrounded by crumpled paper, the computerized writer has his mistakes neatly stored in digital memory.

Dating is the social engagement with the threat of sex at its conclusion.

Detroit is beautiful - though you probably have to be a child of the industrial Midwest, like me, to see it.

Gossip is what you say about the objects of flattery when they aren't present.

Some people are better imagined in one's bed than found there in the morning.