911 Quotes by P. J. O'Rourke

The only really firm rule of taste about cross dressing is that neither sex should ever wear anything they haven't yet figured out how to go to the bathroom in.

Democrats hate stay-at-home spouses, no matter what gender or gender preference.

The young are adept at learning, but even more adept at avoiding it.

We journalists don't have to step on roaches. All we have to do is turn on the kitchen light and watch the critters scutter.

Infant mortality and life expectancy are reasonable indicators of general well-being in a society.

What Enron was doing, what caused investors to embrace it in a rapture of baffled awe, was hiding debt.

No government proposal more complicated than "This note is legal tender for all debts, public and private" ever works.

Democrats hate America being a world power because world power gives power to the nation instead of to Democrats.

People have a right to my food, a right to my housing, and a right to my good job for my decent pay.