911 Quotes by P. J. O'Rourke

Maybe a nation that consumes as much booze and dope as we do and has our kind of divorce statistics should pipe down about "character issues."

In Toledo, people grow out. Out to the suburbs. Out to the parts of America where the economy is more vigorous. And all too often, out to 48-inch waistbands.

Everybody in the Middle East wants to explain why they're right.

There is no virtue in compulsory government charity, and there is no virtue in advocating it. A politician who portrays himself as "caring" and "sensitive" because he wants to expand the government's charitable programs is merely saying that he's willing to try to do good with other people's money. Well, who isn't? And a voter who takes pride in supporting such programs is telling us that he'll do good with his own money -- if a gun is held to his head.

Now for good or ill, California is the place where trends tend to be set in Western civilization - if civilization indeed it is. California, for several generations now, has been the newest, biggest, most experimental place in the newest, biggest, most experimental part of liberal Western capitalism - which is itself a new experiment for mankind.

Violence is interesting. This is a great obstacle to world peace and also to more thoughtful television programming.

Everybody in 15th century Spain was wrong about where China was and as a result, Columbus discovered Caribbean vacations.

Fretting about overpopulation, is a perfect guilt-free— indeed, sanctimonious— way for progressives to be racists.

A little government and a little luck are necessary in life, but only a fool trusts either of them.