460 Quotes by P.J. O'Rourke

Smoking crack is a way for people who couldn’t afford college to study the works of Charles Darwin.

Detroits industrial ruins are picturesque, like crumbling Rome in an 18th-century etching.

The problem isn’t a Congress that won’t cut spending or a president who won’t raise taxes. The problem is an American public with a bottomless sense of entitlement to federal money.

There’s one more terrifying fact about old people: I’m going to be one soon.

You know, if government were a product, selling it would be illegal. Government is a health hazard. Governments have killed many more people than cigarettes or unbuckled seat belts ever have.

This is the most elaborate and luxurious method of convincing others that you can cook. Take everybody out on your yacht until they’re green in the face. Then you can rave for weeks about your sauce marinara and no one will gainsay you...

Journalists aren’t supposed to praise things. It’s a violation of work rules almost as serious as buying drinks with our own money or absolving the CIA of something.

Civilization is an enormous improvement on the lack thereof.

Liberalism is just Communism sold by the drink.