460 Quotes by P.J. O'Rourke

Gay marriage acceptance is happening in the blink of an eye.

There is only one basic human right: the right to do as you please, without causing others harm. With it comes our only basic human duty: the duty to accept the consequences of our actions.

Fashionably amusing table manners are a matter of breaking the right rule at the right time.

A world government run by the UN will be like getting an old, purblind, half-deaf substitute teacher.

The weirder you’re going to behave, the more normal you should look. It works in reverse, too. When I see a kid with three or four rings in his nose, I know there is absolutely nothing extraordinary about that person.

As a libertarian I believe we should have a federal government simple and circumscribed enough to be run by an average, dull, normal American. With George W. Bush we have half the equation in place.

It’s the squares who know how to fly the fighter planes and operate the missiles and the bombs and work the M-16s. Liberals would still be fumbling with the federally mandated trigger locks.

Humor is a terrific tool for explaining things, especially when what you’re explaining is frightening or dull and complicated.

I suspect the soviets never did want to use those bombs. The most Stalinist of Soviet hard-liners – Stalin, for example – must have realized a nuclear war would be a hard thing to clean up after.