3 Quotes by Patrick S. Tomlinson

You're just going to have to accept that people are *never* ready in times like these. Page-turners and bolt-tighteners always demand more time than external forces permit. That's your job. My job is to remind you the real world and the people cutting our checks don't care. So get us as ready as you can in a week, and maybe find yourself a little helping of faith.

There are only two ways a child saddled with a name like Maximus Tiberius turns out. He either becomes confidence personified, or he ends up trapped inside the name like a cruel irony. This child, who already had a beer in each hand and a girl under each arm, had settled on the first option early in life.

So far, everthin’ I’ve used to try to open her’s been about as effective as giving a frog a haircut with a harmonica.