41 Quotes by Peter Cook

I have learned from my mistakes, and I am sure I can repeat them exactly

All right, You Great Git, You've asked for it. I'll cover the world in Tastee-Freez and Wimpy Burgers. I'll fill it with concrete runways, motorways, aircraft, television, automobiles, advertising, plastic flowers, frozen food and supersonic bangs. I'll make it so noisy and disgusting that even You'll be ashamed of Yourself! No wonder You've so few friends. You're unbelievable!

Job was what you'd technically describe as a loony.

I've always wanted to be an expert on tadpoles; I've always fancied being a tadpole expert. It's a wonderful life if you become an experty tadpoleous, as they are known in the trade. You get invited out to all the smart parties and social gatherings. When smart people are making out their lists for the dinner parties, they say, 'Now, who can we have to make up the ten? A tadpole expert would be very nice. He could sit next to Lady Sonia.

I am very interested in the Universe - I am specialising in the Universe and all that surrounds it.

I would much prefer to be a judge than a coal miner because of the absence of falling coal.

I'd be very surprised if he wasn't picked for Germany now. His confidence is sky high, he's in the form of his life and that's what it's all about as a keeper.

I managed to get through the mining exams - they're not very rigorous, they only ask you one question, they say 'Who are you?' and I got seventy-five per cent on that.

My biggest regret in life is saving David Frost from drowning