244 Quotes by Randall Munroe

How fast would a human have to run in order to be cut in half at the bellybutton by a cheese-cutting wire? – Jon Merrill.

Of the 28 people killed by lightning in the US in 2012, 13 were standing under or near trees.

Eventually, they give up, and the unexplained meteorological phenomenon is simply called a “dubstep storm,” because – in the words of one researcher – “It had one hell of a drop.

I think the comic that’s gotten me the most feedback is actually the one about the stoplights. Noticing when the stoplights are in sync, or calculating the length of your strides between floor tiles – normal people notice that kind of stuff, but a certain kind of person will do some calculations.

Without us, Earth’s geology will grind on.

Remember: I am a cartoonist. If you follow my advice on safety around nuclear materials, you probably deserve whatever happens to you.

Plumes of hot meat and bubbles of trapped gases like methane – along with the air from the lungs of the deceased moles – would periodically rise through the mole crust and erupt volcanically from the surface, a geyser of death blasting mole bodies free of the planet.

There’s no material safety data sheet for astatine. If there were, it would just be the word “NO” scrawled over and over in charred blood.

This means the last few years of hard-drive production – which, thanks to increasing size, represents the majority of global storage capacity – would just about fill an oil tanker. So, by that measure, the Internet is smaller than an oil tanker.