21 Quotes by Rob Beckett

I am so excited to announce that I have written a book. I have actually written it myself with no ghost writer, just me! I never thought it would be possible but I have done it.

Where I grew up in South East London you became a cab driver or worked in a flower market.

My three years at Canterbury Christ Church University was the only time in my life I had my own room - first I shared with my brothers and later with my wife Lou.

It's the hardest job in telly as a newbie. You're writing standup every night on your own and presenting live TV. It's like a really tough apprenticeship in front of two million people.

I can't imagine a time I don't want to do standup.

It sounds quite mad, but once I've got a show up and running, walking out on stage is the easiest part of my day. All I've got to do is talk until they laugh and then I stop, let them laugh and talk. It's a bit like meditation really.

I know how hard it is to get a babysitter, get dressed and go out again after work. I'm like, right, I owe you lot a good show.

In the kitchen I just do all the normal stuff - roast dinners - Christmas dinner is probably my signature dish. Nothing baked, though. I just do boring family stuff.

I'm only competitive at stuff I'm good at.