40 Quotes by Sarcastic

I don’t know why we are here, but I’m pretty sure that it is not in order to enjoy ourselves.

He never chooses an opinion; he just wears whatever happens to be in style.

Marriage is the chief cause of divorce.

Never put off till tomorrow what may be done day after tomorrow just as well.

We are never deceived; we deceive ourselves.

I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly.

I will always love the false image I had of you.

That’s why they call it the American Dream, because you have to be asleep to believe it.

How can a woman be expected to be happy with a man who insists on treating her as if she were a perfectly normal human being.