564 Quotes by Scott Adams

Our guys know they are about to play the toughest game on our schedule. We know what is ahead of us with seeding and the playoffs. But all that is in the hands of our leaders and veterans. If they want to go out and win these games, then they can.

On the keyboard of life, always keep one finger on the escape key.

As network administrator I can take down the network with one keystroke. It's just like being a doctor but without getting gooky stuff on my paws.

There's a fine line between participation and mockery.

My training is in business and economics, so my mind gravitates toward the business model,

Few things in life are less efficient than a group of people trying to write a sentence. The advantage of this method is that you end up with something for which you will not be personally blamed.

If your boss gets drunk and offers to photocopy her posterior, do not helpfully suggest pressing reduce 75%.

It fascinates me that there are people like that, and they're allowed to vote.

He changed more times than a baby in a beer-drinking contest.