116 Quotes by Soraya Chemaly

It is hard to overstate how problematic the transfer of anger, as a resource, from girls to boys and from women to men is - not only to us as individuals but to our society. This transfer is critical to maintaining white supremacy and patriarchy. Anger remains the emotion that is least acceptable for girls and women because it is the first line of defense against injustice.

Studies show that differences between men's and women's experiences of feeling angry are virtually nonexistent. Where there is a difference, they defy stereotypes of men being the so-called angry sex... women report feeling anger more frequently, more intensely, and for longer periods of time than men do.

If there is a word that should be retired from use in the service of women's expression, health, well-being, and equality, it is appropriate - a sloppy, mushy word that purports to convey some important moral essence but in reality is just a policing term used to regulate our language, appearance and demands. It's a control word. We are done with control.

Insults are the most common provocation for anger because, whether we think about this or not, they generate social imbalances.

Even in school, children get subtle messages about whose stories matter. Literature classes routinely feature literature written by women and men of color as exceptional (one among many white male writers) or available for study in some schools as elective classes only. A recent global review found that gender bias is also "rife in textbooks." The result of pedagogical choices like these shape self-esteem, empathy, and understanding. They also shape resentment, confusion, and anger.

In a study of children's toy and television preferences, researchers Isabelle Cherney and Kamala London found that, when left alone, half of boys ages five through thirteen picked "girl" and "boy" toys equally - until they thought they were being watched. They were especially concerned about what their fathers would think if they saw them. Over time, boys' interests in toys and media become more rigidly masculinized and codified, whereas girls' stay relatively open ended and flexible.

... people who allow themselves to feel the fullest range of emotions, including the unpleasant ones, are happier and lead more fulfilling lives...

In anger, I have lived more fully, freely, intensely, sensitively, and politically.

Rage became a layer of my skin.