143 Quotes by Stephen Leacock

The Lord said 'let there be wheat' and Saskatchewan was born.

There are two things in ordinary conversation which ordinary people dislike - information and wit.

The landlady of a boarding-house is a parallelogram - that is, an oblong angular figure, which cannot be described, but which is equal to anything.

A sportsman is a man who every now and then, simply has to get out and kill something.

Advertising may be described as the science of arresting the human intelligence long enough to get money from it.

The parent who could see his boy as he really is would shake his head and say, 'Willie is no good. I'll sell him.'

And beer rolled down the Tennessee and California Wine Was used as Blood for Hollywood.

A sportsman is a man who, every now and then, simply has to get out and kill something. Not that he's cruel. He wouldn't hurt a fly. It's not big enough.