3,122 Quotes by Terry Pratchett

But the reward for lots of work seemed to be lots more. If you dug the biggest hole, they just gave you a bigger shovel.

The monk solved his immediate problem by giving a little whimper and fainting.

Heroes get kingdoms and princesses, and they take regular exercise, and when they smile the light glints off their teeth, ting

They are all good lads, said Carrot softly. I'm sure if the two of you call on each and every one of them and explain the situation, they will see where their duty lies. Tell them... tell them there is always an easy way, if you know where to look.

He wondered what kind of life it would be, having to keep swimming all the time to stay exactly in the same place. Pretty similar to his own, he decided.

Can you swim?" said Victor. One of the cavern's rotting pillars crashed down behind them. From the pit itself came a terrible wailing. "Not very well," said Ginger. "Me neither," he said. The commotion behind them was getting worse. "Still," he said, taking her hand. "We could look on this as a great opportunity to improve really quickly.

Even the blind and meek and voiceless have gods.

Thou shalt not submit thy god to market forces.

Taxation, gentlemen, is very much like dairy farming. The task is to extract the maximum amount of milk with the minimum amount of moo.