3,122 Quotes by Terry Pratchett

The senior wizard in a world of magic had the same prospects of long-term employment as a pogo stick tester in a minefield.

The storm was really giving it everything it had. This was its big chance. It had spent years hanging around the provinces, putting in some useful work as a squall, building up experience, making contacts, occasionally leaping out on unsuspecting shepherds or blasting quite small oak trees. Now an opening in the weather had given it an opportunity to strut its hour, and it was building up its role in the hope of being spotted by one of the big climates.

Dickens, as you know, never got round to starting his home page.

It takes forty men with their feet on the ground to keep one man with his head in the air.

In Genua, someone set out to make dreams come true. Remember some of your dreams?

Next comes the realist phase ("After all, from a purely geometrical point of view a cat is only a tube with a door at the top.").

We have been so successful in the past century at the art of living longer and staying alive that we have forgotten how to die. Too often we learn the hard way. As soon as the baby boomers pass pensionable age, their lesson will be harsher still.

And what would humans be without love?" RARE, said Death.

And then you bit onto them, and learned once again that Cut-me-own-Throat Dibbler could find a use for bits of an animal that the animal didn't know it had got. Dibbler had worked out that with enough fried onions and mustard people would eat anything.