3,122 Quotes by Terry Pratchett

Shoes, men, coffins; never accept the first one you see.

Cats don't hunt seals. They would if they knew what they were and where to find them. But they don't, so that's all right.

You can't build a plot out of jokes. You need tragic relief. And you need to let people know that when a lot of frightened people are running around with edged weaponry, there are deaths. Stupid deaths, usually. I'm not writing 'The A-Team' - if there's a fight going on, people will get hurt. Not letting this happen would be a betrayal.

The world is a globe — the farther you sail, the closer to home you are.

[The pamphlet] was very patriotic. That is, it talked about killing foreigners.

This was the definition of eternity; it was the space of time devised by the Great God Om to ensure that everyone got the punishment that was due to them.

Words are the litmus paper of the minds. If you find yourself in the power of someone who will use the word "commence" in cold blood, go somewhere else very quickly. But if they say "Enter", don't stop to pack.

The author can always delve into his own personality and find aspects of himself with which he can dress his characters.

Nothing I can say or devise, and nothing anybody else can say or devise, is going to be perfect.