3,122 Quotes by Terry Pratchett

She was convinced that she was anorexic, because every time she looked in the mirror she did indeed see a fat person.

Stupid men are often capable of things the clever would not dare to contemplate...

The theater troubled her. It had a magic of its own, one that didn’t belong to her, one that wasn’t in her control. It changed the world, and said things were otherwise than they were. And it was worse than that. It was magic that didn’t belong to magical people. It was commanded by ordinary people, who didn’t know the rules. They altered the world because it sounded better.

But here's some advice, boy. Don't put your trust in revolutions. They always come around again. That's why they're called revolutions.

The conflict is not between Christianity and Islam or between East and West - instead, it is between stupid people and other stupid people.

'Educational' refers to the process, not the object. Although, come to think of it, some of my teachers could easily have been replaced by a cheeseburger.

I had a deprived childhood, you see. I had lots of other kids to play with and my parents bought me outdoor toys and refused to ill-treat me, so it never occurred to me to seek solitary consolation with a good book.

Nature abhors a lot of things, including vacuums, ships called the Marie Celeste, and the chuck keys for electric drills.

But in his experience it was only a matter of time before the normal balance of the universe restored itself and started doing the usual terrible things to him.