3,122 Quotes by Terry Pratchett

I wouldn’t trust you with a bucket of water if my knickers were on fire!

It’s lies. It’s all lies. Some of them are just prettier than others, that’s all. People see what they think is there.

It’s actually true that I keep myself going by constantly promising myself that in response for the hard work I will be allowed to do some more hard work later on.

Curiosity may have killed the cat, but her’s curiosity could have massacred a pride of lions.

All he knew was that you couldn’t hope to try for the big stuff, like world peace and happiness, but you might just about be able to achieve some tiny deed that’d make the world, in a small way, a better place. Like shooting someone.

I don’t think I’ve drunk enough beer to understand that.

Good or bad, do it as you. Too many lies and there’s no truth to go back to.

Probably the last sound heard before the Universe folded up like a paper hat would be someone saying, ‘What happens if I do this?’

In fact, the mere act of opening the box will determine the state of the cat, although in this case there were three determinate states the cat could be in: these being Alive, Dead, and Bloody Furious.