46 Quotes by Tiffany Haddish

The body is a universal language. Because if you spoke French, and I speak English, but I move like this or do certain movements, I can still make you smile and laugh.

My therapist was like, 'What brings joy to your heart?' And I was like, 'I like to see teeth. I guess maybe I should have been a dentist.'

I've studied Charlie Chaplin for years. I've studied Lucille Ball, Carol Burnett, all of them. I don't play around. This is not a game.

No matter what the situation, I try to have fun. I get pulled over by the police, I'm like, 'Oh, this going to be the best arrest ever.' And I end up making friends with these police officers.

I'm so sleepy most of the time, but I guess it's 'cause I'm constantly doing things and trying to move forward and set up for the master plan. The master plan is to be, like, little baby Oprah, with my own production company, maybe my own channel, inspire millions.

I feel like a foster kid that's been in the system for a long time, and then at 16, somebody adopted them and said, 'You can go to college, and you ain't got to pay no student loans.' I feel happy. I feel accepted after all these years of blood, sweat, and tears.

Everybody in my life who is important to me is a star to me.

Arnold Schwarzenegger didn't become Mr. Universe because he went to the gym every now and then. He did it on a regular basis. It's the same thing with comedy. I try to perform seven nights a week.

You're the only one that's in control of your emotions; you're the only one that's inside of you at all times. So control you however you want to. If you're not happy, that's your fault.