129 Quotes by Tom Holt

Human beings can get used to virtually anything, given plenty of time and no choice in the matter whatsoever.

I’m perfectly cheerful, thank you,’ said Flosshilde coldly.

Georgie paused on the threshold for a moment as if hesitant to enter the habitation of such a perjurer lest it should be struck by lightning.

He turned and gave the Dark Elf a nasty look. “They can do that,” he said, “mess with your head, using arcane mind control techniques. Well-known fact.”The Dark Elf sniggered. “I wish,” he said. “Sadly, no. You’re thinking of journalism, which is slightly different.

Thanks anyway,' Vanderdecker repeated, and wandered off to have a stare at the sea. It was his equivalent to beating his head repeatedly against a wall.

Only please, do be careful to bear in mind that Mordak’s a goblin. Enlightened, yes, but a goblin. He likes his employees loyal or lightly steamed on a bed of bruised rocket.

Pile up that gold around my head. I must take it with me to pay the ferryman.’‘I thought it was just a coin on the eyes or something.’‘Inflation. Also, I’ll take up rather a lot of room on the boat.

And if I’ve got to die, I want to die an editor.

Just when you’ve squared up to the solemn realisation that life is a bitch, it turns round and does something nice, just to confuse you. - Emily Spitzer, The Better Mousetrap