911 Quotes by Tom Robbins

Salvador Dali and fifty cents will get you a cup of clock melt.

There's probably no subject with quite so many conflictin' opinions about it as there are about food, and 'tis better to swap bubble gum with a rabid bulldog than challenge a single one o' the varyin' beliefs your average human holds about nutrition.

I've always assumed that every time a child is born, the Divine reenters the world. Okay? That's the meaning of the Christmas story. And every time that child's purity is corrupted by society, that's the meaning of the Crucifixion story. Your man Jesus stands for that child, that pure spirit, and as its surrogate, he's being born and put to death again and again, over and over, every time we inhale and exhale, not just at the vernal equinox and on the 25th of December.

First I think I was interested in the stories, and later on, I became more interested in the language itself, so the stories became almost secondary, but it was kind of a background music for my life.

Magic things are fond of deceptions.

Never be afraid to make a fool of yourself. The furthest out you can go is the best place to be.

Violence stinks no matter which side of it you're on. But now and then there's nothing left to do but hit the other person over the head with a frying pan.

O tequila, savage water of sorcery, what confusion and mischief your sly, rebellious drops do generate

Don't trust anybody who'd rather be grammatically correct than have a good time.