911 Quotes by Tom Robbins

Well, there’s one thing to be said for money. It can make you rich.

Of course I’m inconsistent! Only logicians and cretins are consistent!

Just because you’re naked doesn’t mean you’re sexy. Just because you’re cynical doesn’t mean you’re cool.

Liberty, the very opposite of ownership and control, cannot, then, result from political action, either at the polls or the barricades, but rather evolves out of attitude. If it results from anything, it may be levity.

On second thought, it’s unlikely that anybody can teach another to excel in bed. Rather, what they might do is awaken in the other her or his predisposition for copulative excellence.

Leave me in the night but please don’t leave me in the dark.

As expected, you get his machine. Someday, even the “call of nature” will be answered by a machine.

Tequila, scorpion honey, harsh dew of the doglands, essence of Aztec, crema de cacti; tequila, oily and thermal like the sun in solution; tequila, liquid geometry of passion; Tequila, the buzzard god who copulates in midair with the ascending souls of dying virgins; tequila, firebug in the house of good taste; O tequila, savage water of sorcery, what confusion and mischief your sly, rebellious drops do generate!

The ones who’re so upset about everybody not being the same, about competition, about standards of quality, about art objects having ’auras’ around them, they’re usually people with average abilities and average minds. And below average senses of humor.