450 Quotes by Tom Waits

Children make up the best songs, anyway. Better than grown-ups. Kids are always working on songs and throwing them away, like little origami things or paper airplanes. They don’t care if they lose it; they’ll just make another one.

The beginning of it starts at the end.

There’s always free cheddar in the mousetrap, baby.

A gentleman is someone who can play the accordion, but doesn’t.

It’s hard to play with a bagpipe player. It’s like an exotic bird. I love the sound, it’s like strangling a goose.

Most songs that aren’t jump-rope songs, or lullabies, are cautionary tales or goodbye songs and road songs.

Don’t you know there ain’t no devil, it’s just god when he’s drunk.

If you get far enough away you’ll be on your way back home.

On my gravestone, I want it to say, “I told you I was sick.”