250 Quotes by Tucker Carlson

I mean, look, no matter how you feel about Bush, watching him speak is difficult. It's like- it's like watching a drunk man cross an icy street.

Politicians are interesting people, most of them are smart and hard-working-I mean, they keep schedules no one else would think of keeping. Some of them live down to the caricature, but most of them are good people and they are charming.

The Clinton era is over. I think that there would even have been a certain amount of rejoicing among some Republicans if Gore had won or if Ralph Nader had won or if Satan had won.

The two things I was positive about in life were that I was going to be a teacher at a boarding school or an operative with the CIA posted abroad. I could write a book about all the things I was sure about.

Christianity isn't dead. It still has the capacity to scare people. It still gives people the creeps, which means there is still some power behind the religion, as sort of watered down as it can be.

I'm a foot soldier in the war on Christmas. And the war on puppies and sunshine.

I think Michael Moore is loathsome, though, not because he dislikes Bush, but because he seems to dislike America.

Grover Norquist is a mean-spirited, humorless, dishonest little creep... an embarrassing anomaly, the leering, drunken uncle everyone else wishes would stay home... [He] is repulsive, granted, but there aren't nearly enough of him to start a purge trial.

Feminism's latest victory: the right to get your limbs blown off in war. Congratulations.