1,171 Quotes by Will Rogers

Man only learns in two ways, one by reading, and the other by association with smarter people.

It's hard to tell whether there is more guns or flowers at a gangster's funeral. I would rather have the undertaker's privilege with some high-class gang, than to have a seat on the Stock Exchange.

A diplomatic language has a hundred ways of saying nothing but no way of saying something.

Personally I have always felt that the best doctor in the world is the veterinarian. He can't ask his patients what's the matter—He's got to just know.

There is something about riding on a prancing horse that makes you feel like something, even when you aint worth a thing

Nothing will kill the movies, except education.

Political elections... are a good deal like marriages, there's no accounting for anyone's taste.

Something that seems funny when it happens to someone else, may not seem so funny when it happens to us.

Eventually you reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.