1,171 Quotes by Will Rogers

Technocracy wants to do everything by machinery. . . . Machinery is doing just fine. If it can't kill you, it will put you out of work.

Every guy looks in his pocket and then votes.

I have always said that a conference was held for one reason only, to give everybody a chance to get sore at everybody else. Sometimes it takes two or three conferences to scare up a war, but generally one will do it.

I was just thinking, if it is really religion with these nudist colonies, they sure must turn atheists in the wintertime.

Our country has plenty of five-cent cigars, but the trouble is they charge fifteen cents for them.

Steak on the plate went up. Steak on the hoof went down.

Say as little as possible while appearing to be awake.

People want just taxes more than they want lower taxes. They want to know that every man is paying his proportionate share according to his wealth.

Every Gag I tell must be based on truth. No matter how much I may exaggerate it, it must have a certain amount of Truth.... Now Rumor travels Faster, but it don't stay put as long as Truth.