106 Quotes by Wilson Mizner

A fellow who is always declaring he's no fool usually has his suspicions.

Life's a tough proposition, and the first hundred years are the hardest.

The cuckoo who is on to himself is halfway out of the clock.

I know of no sentence that can induce such immediate and brazen lying as the one that begins, 'Have you read - .'

Popularity is exhausting. The life of the party almost always winds up in a corner with an overcoat over him.

Hollywood is a sewer with service from the Ritz Carlton.

I've had ample contact with lawyers, and I'm convinced that the only fortune they ever leave is their own.

I've spent several years in Hollywood, and I still think the movie heroes are in the audience.

A slave has but one master. An ambition man, has as many as there are people who helped him get his fortune.