And yet another part of me knew that if he showed up tonight and I disliked the start of whatever was in store for me, I'd still go through with it, go with it all the way, because better to find out once and for all than to spend the rest of the summer, or my life perhaps, arguing with my body.

What a world this was. She was more than twice my age but I could have made love to her this minute and wept with her.

What I didn't realize was that wanting to test desire is nothing more than a ruse to get what we want without admitting that we want it.

I think everyone is wounded in their sex,” I said. “I can’t think of one person who isn’t.

I couldn't understand how boldness and sorrow, how you're so hard and do you really care for me? could be so thoroughly bound together. Nor could I begin to fathom how someone so seemingly vulnerable, hesitant, and eager to confide so many uncertainties about herself could, with one and the same gesture, reach into my pants with unabashed recklessness and hold on to my cock and squeeze it.