High School. Society’s bright idea to put all their aggressive, naive youth into one environment to torment and emotionally scar each other for life.

When one thing takes another away, what do we call that?” she asked my class. “Homicide!” I called out

I should retire for the night," she said. "I know I make it look so effortless, but world domination is exhausting.

Jack and Jill went up that hill, for a supposed pail of water," Mother Goose said. "Jack fell down, broke his crown, 'cause Jill pushed him-but no one caught her.

Boys, I've changed my mind about the homosexuals," God said. "Perhaps acting out the physical urges they're born with is not as bad as committing murder, rape, and theft. I don't think they deserve to go to hell and I regret ever implying it." "I think that's a great decision," Moses said. "We've been getting some complains that hell is maxed to capacity. We weren't sure how to respond because, you know, it's supposed to be hell.

I, for one, am a CNN junkie. I’m convinced it stands for Chris Needs News.

This world has goblins and fairies but weres an escalator when you need one?

Most skeletons in the closet don't have wings. - Conner Bailey, to Alex Bailey

I got in my car and just drove. I drove and I drove and I drove. I wasn't sure where I was going and I didn't care. I didn't even plan on coming home to be totally honest...I beat that sign until my fingernails bled and my umbrella was broken to pieces. I left a dent in it for every asshole who had treated me like shit, for every time I had been used, and for every time I had been wronged...I drove as far as I could until there was no more road left to take.