She asked if I loved another woman, so I answered honestly and said, “Dinner was great, but I could go for dessert.

I love like I’m thirsty. Can I offer you a tall glass of Sahara sand?


I unwrapped my love for her like one might unwrap leftovers. Gotta eat up the old stuff first, as a cannibal might say in a retirement home.


Love is a banana. First you peel it, and then you roll on the condom.