The AVP’s ambivalence extends to displaying affection. They can at once show interest and then shut this interest off when the spouse responds more intimately. The spouse is left with feelings of disappointment and discouragement, annoyance, and confusion.

The more stressors in an AVP’s life, the more heightened is his or her unfolding ambivalence. This action blocks the forward motion of a warm, intimate relationship. They are preoccupied; they are stressed;

In their effort to avoid conflicts, they have avoided intimacy. They can feel numb to a spouse’s needs. Messages become jumbled and can eventually almost stop being taken in by the AVP.

Both men and women AVPs are emotionally silent. The notable loss of intimacy is reported by the spouse of the AVP. These day-to-day losses are very wearing on the spouse.