I am not a glutton - I am an explorer of food

Thanksgiving dinners take eighteen hours to prepare. They are consumed in twelve minutes. Half-times take twelve minutes. This is not coincidence.

Seize the moment. Remember all those women on the 'Titanic' who waved off the dessert cart.

The odds of going to the store for a loaf of bread and coming out with only a loaf of bread are three billion to one.

I come from a home where gravy is a beverage.

What we're really talking about is a wonderful day set aside on the fourth Thursday of November when no one diets. I mean, why else would they call it Thanksgiving?

Those magazine dieting stories always have the testimonial of a woman who wore a dress that could slipcover New Jersey in one photo and thirty days later looked like a well-dressed thermometer.

Like religion, politics, and family planning, cereal is not a topic to be brought up in public. It's too controversial.