"Grrrrowpt.” said dead Penelope. Dead Huthbert nodded, and hugged her. She moved his dusty hand from her dusty ass." — BATS 2015"

"Do it for the kids! The ones who look up to you — especially when they are pleading for their lives." — Bats 2015"

"Gentle With Them Thar Spurs'—a sequel to 'Riders of the Purple Sau-Sage.' Spurs was the feminist novel of its day…which was Tuesday." —Bats 2015"

"Elizabeth poured the brewskilicious foam over her aforementioned bodalicious huzza-huzzas and Wahwahzoozie." — Bats 2015"

"Purrrrrrrr” Elizabeth kneaded Vlad's pecs. “I hear a Kitty!” Vlad’s eyes sprung open. There was a moment of hurt, of sad. There was no kitty. “You’re teasing me!" — Bats"

"Elizabeth served herself to Vlad upon the Lazy Susan (Susan wasn’t lazy. She was actually dead." — Bats 2015"

"He sniffed until the long hairs of his mustache had been sucked up into his nose and out of his leafy ears." — Bats 2015"

"She could feel something unnatural following her every movement as she washed her bountiful Huzza and Wahzoozie" — BATS"

"...an ambitious array of dishonorable intentions that he intended to wield upon the Countess’s nether regions. — BATS 2015"

"They’re dogs. Never trust a man. Even when he’s dead. Especially when he’s dead. — Bats 2015"