57 Quotes by Ilona Andrews about humor
- Author Ilona Andrews
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We can get you a throne with snakes. I’ll stand next to you and roar at anybody who fails to grovel. Fear Kate Daniels. She is a mighty and terrible ruler. Grendel can anoint the petitioners with his vomit. It’ll be great . . .
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- Author Ilona Andrews
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Curran looked back at me. "Why is it you always attract creeps?""You tell me." Ha! Walked right into that one, yes, he did.
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It's a reflex. Hear a bell, get food. See an undead, throw a knife. Same thing, really.
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I can't give you the white picket fence, and if I did, you'd set it on fire.
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Did he just rip out the engine?" I asked."Yes", Saiman said. "And now he is demolishing the Maserati with it."Ten seconds later Curran hurled the twisted wreck of black and orange that used to be the Maserati into the wall.The first melodic notes of an old song came from the computer. I glanced at Saiman.He shrugged. "It begged for a soundtrack.
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- Author Ilona Andrews
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Help me, I can’t breathe, your ego is pushing all the air out of the room.
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I gave him my best cryptic smile. He did not fall down to his feet, kiss my shoes, and promise me the world. I must be getting rusty.
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It seems that the young woman made some indelicate suggestion of a threesome...When I got there, Miss Nash was standing by the hot tub in a small bikini, pointing the business end of a SIG-Sauer P-226 at her fella and concerned members of the hotel staff, while dunking the scantily clad female's head under the water and asking, "Who's diving for clams now, bitch?
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- Author Ilona Andrews
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Georgie, stop trying to resurrect the shoes. They were never alive in the first place.
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