People always say that pregnant women have a glow. And I say it's because you're sweating to death.

I feel like I have a bowling ball sitting on my hoohah! Apparently I have a lot of amniotic fluid, so whenever my water breaks it will be like a fire hydrant!

I just started calling myself 'Swamp A-.' Like, I have swamp a- right now. I had major swamp a- because I was wearing these Spanx to hold in my gut ... It's like the bayou up in that region.

We were going to have an all-day drinking binge. Gonna ride our bikes, hang out... do naughty things. But I started feeling this overwhelming guilt.

I had a dream that she put her foot through my belly button and I was playing this little piggy went to the market just with her toes, just her foot was sticking out of my belly button and it was completely normal!

Fried Oreos. What were we talking about before? That's pregnancy-brain for ya! Ha ha ha ha!

It's not good to throw back scotch with a new fetus.

It's like carrying a bowling ball! Almost done.

Labor is really going to hurt.