Horse: Fuckin' knight in shining armor. Might wanna trade your bike in for a pretty pink unicorn to ride, seein' as you're such a special snowflake and all.

Horse: So tell me, brother. How many times you seen The Notebook? 'Cause that's information the boys back home are gonna need to know.

Horse: Wood like you were sporting usually implies the opposite. Unless it was for me? If that's the case, I'm genuinely flattered. No judgements.

Marie's drunk texts:Marie: Horse, muss yuMarie: Why dont anser?Marie: Horse like yur name. Horsey. I'd like to rid u horsey, LOL. You sleeping? Or busy with someone?Marie: I know yur there. I bet you got a new gurl alredy. Screw you.Marie: Screw you and your slut. I hate you. Take yur club and shove it up yur ass I wudn't be yoor old lady for ten milion dollrs.

True story,” Horse chimed in. “Fuck with us, we’ll fuck you back. Harder. Always.