The world takes us to a silver screen on which flickering images of passion and romance play, and as we watch, the world says, “This is love.” God takes us to the foot of a tree on which a naked and bloodied man hangs and says, “This is love.

First we must understand that all of the world's deceptions flow from the belief that love is primarily for the fulfillment and comfort of the self. The world poisons love by focusing first and foremost on meeting one's own needs.Christ taught that love is not for the fulfillment of the self but for the Glory of God and the food of others. True love is selfless. It gives; it sacrifices; it dies to its own needs.

Every relationship for a Christian is an opportunity to love another person like God has loved us.

Having a girlfriend was no longer my greatest need. Knowing and obeying Him was . I wanted to please Him in my relationships even if it meant looking radical and foolish to other people - even if it meant kissing dating goodbye.

And He was the one who invented marriage so that the blazing fire of romantic love could become something even more beautiful - a pulsing, red-hot ember of covenant love in marriage.Why did He do it? For the same reason that He made sunsets and mountain ranges and fireflies! Because He's good. Because He wants to give us a million different opportunities to see just how wonderful He is.

True love isn’t just expressed in passionately whispered words oran intimate kiss or an embrace; before two people are married, love isexpressed in self-control, patience, even words left unsaid.

In the past, the starting point of my relationships was what Iwanted instead of what God wanted. I looked out for my needs andfit others into my agenda. Did I find fulfillment? No, I found onlycompromise and heartache. I not only hurt others; I also hurt myself,and most seriously, I sinned against God.

We can't change by fancy methods. We can't change by mere willpower. But God's Spirit working in us can help us to "will and to act according to his good purpose" (Philippians 2:13).