Her sudden grin depleted some of his brain cells. She was evil like that.

He could’ve penned a rendition of Moby Dick in Pig Latin and he wouldn’t have been the wiser.

He needed a stiff drink. With a side of straightjacket.

He bit back a weary sigh and tried to remember strangling her would solve squat.

She needed to come with an instructional manual. And one not written in Spanish.