Silly cop, I don't need your help; I have a werewolf on retainer.

That’s what a skinwalker is: a mean asshole with a meaner spirit squatting inside.” Oberon said.

The answer to enemies who heal annoyingly fast is always, always decapitation. That is why swords will never go out of style.

When you’re in the middle of a killing field and the fucking Chooser of the Slain tells you to do something, you do it

My hens all died and my plow is broke My well is dry and my yak just croaked My farm’s all rotted straight down to the roots But I don’t care because now I can wearrrrr—! My worldwide, superglide, yellow-dyed, verified, Certified, ratified, justified and dignified, Qualified ironside, fortified and purified, Bona fide, amplified, khernhide boots!

My dad's idea of bonding was throwing me in the tar pits to teach me a lesson, though I'm not sure what the lesson was, except to stay the hell away from Da.

Are you going to kick somebody’s ass?I don’t know. Maybe.Well, I’m not going to worry. I’ve watched you spar with that martial arts dummy in the backyard lots of times, and you always win.Thanks, buddy. I’ll see you soon.

I quietly cast camouflage on myself, which is the nearest I can come to invisibility. It binds my pigment to my surroundings, so that I become practically invisible when I remain still. People can see me if I move quickly, but if I imitate the Rock of Gibraltar they have to really know I’m there to spot me. I figured it was best: Naked women rarely welcome the approach of strange naked men, except in porn movies.

That’s what a skinwalker is: a mean asshole with a meaner spirit squatting inside.” "I’ve run into some of those at the dog park," Oberon said. "They’re usually attached to Chihuahuas.