We have children to pursue other elements of well-being. We want meaning in life. We want relationships.

What determines how much time and deliberate practice a child is willing to devote to achievement? Nothing less than her character.

The clearer the rules and the limits enforced by parents, the higher the child's self-esteem. The more freedom the child had, the lower his self-esteem.

We deprive our children, our charges, of persistence. What I am trying to say is that we need to fail, children need to fail, we need to feel sad, anxious and anguished. If we impulsively protect ourselves and our children, as the feel-good movement suggests, we deprive them of learning-persistence skills.