Hekate smacked the mirror down. "I'd never fancy you," she retorted to Hermes. "And if you ever try to kiss me, I'll--I'll keep a snake hidden in my clothes and make it bite you. On the lips. And on both ears.""See, your threats are still age twelve," Hermes said. "I'll help you work on that.

Hermes visited him in the Underworld a few days before the spring equinox festival, cajoling Hades to come to it.Hades wandered across the fields with him, Kerberos limping along at his side. “No one wants the god of death at their fertility festival.”“Sure they do. I’ve heard plenty of girls sighing over your tasty darkness.”“Tasty darkness. Really.

You're welcome to as much wine as you can drink, Ares."...[Ares] watched two bare-breasted women stroll by. "Am I welcome to your worshippers as well?""If they'll have you. Force yourself on anyone, though, and the cat gets to gnaw on your anatomy." Dionysos nodded to Agria, who prowled around the crowd. "Those are the rules."Ares smirked. ... "No problem there. I'm very persuasive."Hermes shook his head at Dionysos and mouthed in comical exaggeration, *No, he's not.*

Hermes, we love you," Hades said, "but you rarely do as you're told, and you always do as you wish, and I haven't the slightest idea what you'd do with an immortality fruit, but I'm sure it would be both creative and disastrous.