But the more I think it, the more I want her, the more my desire rises and swells.

I felt that thread that had come between us, tugging, tugging at my heart—so hard, it hurt me.

She said, 'It is filled with all the words for how I want you.

She raised her head when she heard my step, and her gaze met my own, over the matron's dipping shoulder, and her eyes grew bright. I knew then how hard it had been to keep, not just from Millbank but from her. I felt that little quickening. It was just as I imagine a woman must feel, when the baby within her gives its first kick. Does it matter if I feel that, that is so small, and silent, and secret?

It made me giddy. It made me blush, worse than before. It was like liquor. It made me drunk. I drew away. When her breath came now upon my mouth, it came very cold. My mouth was wet, from hers. I said, in a whisper,'Do you feel it?

It's a curious, wanting thing.

Undressing myself had no fun in it, now I had undressed her.